The first of these "occasions" turned out to be a good thing after all. I won't bore you with all the details, but it was job related and I had TUBS of printed "evidence" to back myself up. About 3 years worth, to be exact! If there's one thing I can be, it's fierce, when needed.
The second was a matter of love. No explanation needed for that one, other than it was my choice and I later regretted it. Turns out I was the only one regretting it! I dwelled on this one for a LONG time and started having panic attacks. I didn't think I would ever get over it.
Then, one day I stumbled across an idea for letting go. I don't remember whether I read it in a magazine or heard about it on some talk show, but I decided to try it. What was the worst that could happen?! So, I took a piece of paper and wrote "Fred (not his real name!), I love you, but I am giving this to God." Then I carefully folded that piece of paper and placed it into a pretty blue and white toile tin and put the lid on it. I moved on with my life and knew that God would handle the situation appropriately and I needn't worry about it anymore. And I didn't. IT WORKED!
This time though, I think I need to try a different approach. I don't need to put it down on paper and put it in a pretty lidded tin; He already knows what needs to happen and I trust Him to handle things appropriately. Again. But, I do need to say a few things that I couldn't say before. Once I get them out of my mind, it will be like putting them into that tin. They'll be gone, I'll feel better and the blackness will be gone from within. Forever! (I just hope that He forgives me for the things I'm about to say!)
I spent about 6 years in the land of Sneera Badly, the last 3 or so as a supervisor. Just like everyone else who works, there were days when I wanted to say things like "You're just a bitch!", or "Get your lazy ass back on the phone, since that's what we're paying you to do.", or "I don't give a shit how great you think you are, you aren't any better than anyone else around here. Get over it!" But alas, these are not appropriate things to say in the workplace. : (
So, since I no longer work there, I'd like to take this opportunity to say all the things I REALLY wanted to say, but couldn't. For anyone reading this, who may have worked with me at Sneera Badly, please note that these are in no particular order. Just because you might be mentioned last, doesn't mean that I liked you more than the others. Similarly, if I mention you first, or at the top of the list, pop that inflated ego now; it doesn't mean you have any more importance in this story than anyone else. If I haven't mentioned you, I may have liked you. (And you probably already know if this is the case!)
Before I begin, please note that these are my opinions and feelings only. (Although, I'm sure that some of the people that still work with you would like to say these things to you also, but can't!)
P.A. - You are one of the most negative people I have ever met. It's draining being around you, while all that negativity oozes from your mouth. Nothing is ever good enough for you, and no matter what good things come your way, all you ever seem to talk about is what you feel you should be getting, what should have happened, etc. Even your own "friends" had to have a chat with you about the negativity. Clue!
B.T.- You are the poster child for white trash. Really. I honestly expected to find out that you lived in a double wide. Your grammar is beyond horrible. Who (besides you) staples the hem of their pants....both legs.....and continues to wear them that way? Truth. I never wanted to hire you. You got lucky. We were out of candidates at the time and your vague connection to A.W. got you in the door. Although, she tried to sort of (In her own wishy-washy kind of way!) put some distance between the two of you during our discussions about whether or not to hire you. I think she saw what I saw in you, but we were out of options at the time and she probably wanted to move on to some other hiring project.
N.W. - (Insert music from Abba here.)You, my dear, are more two-faced than the Batman movie character himself! Trust me, I knew it and never doubted it. I NEVER trusted you. All those times when you said to me "You know I'm comfortable with you and will tell you what I think.".....you were really putting on a show. Unfortunately, not a good one. I knew you were wearing out the carpet between your cubicle and S.B.'s office. Speaking of S.B., it was so sweet of you to go on all those shopping trips with her and help her pick out clothes for business trips. (Lord knows she can't really dress herself well and needs all the help she can get.) How convenient that she is your Manager. I'm sure that really helped you out, all those times you went into her office to complain that I was asking you to do your job. And by the way, just so you are aware, S.B. doesn't really have your back. Most times, after you made that short walk to her office, she would bring it up in our supervisor meetings, or just to me, and then say "You know how N. is." and then brush it off. Personally, I think you need to take more Xanax.....everyday.
K.E. - You and P.A. have a fierce competition going for the most negative person in the department. I think you are slightly ahead though, since she's only in the office 3 days a week. I've never met another woman that seems to enjoy making her co-workers cry. You've done it multiple times and that's just wrong. I think it would be good for you to realize that you no longer own or run your own business. No one at Sneera Badly even cares how you would do it, or did do it. Sneera Badly is NOT your business and it might be a good idea for you to zip it and realize that you are now an employee in someone else's business. Your previous business is nothing like the quilted handbag business. Just to let you know, you are not as sneaky as you think you are! We are all aware of what you (and your "friends") were up to, and what you did. If that's how you would run a business, I for one, am VERY glad that I never had to work for you. Not very professional and definitely lacking in integrity. Just sayin......
J.T. - Let's just get the obvious out of the way. I KNOW WHAT YOU (AND YOUR FRIENDS.) DID! Although you claim to be so pure and clean, (At least you did on that one day!) we all know better. I give you credit for being smart enough to think of it. (If it was your own idea.) I wish I had thought of it first....I would have used it on several people in the department......IF I WERE MEAN ENOUGH TO DO THAT TO ANOTHER PERSON. However mean ya'll may have thought I was, I would NEVER have done that to another person. Ever. Justify it as you might, but be sure to mention it when you go for your next confession. (Even though He also already knows what you did.)
You were another person I didn't want to hire. Your belief that seniority entitles you to what you want is ludicrous. Long before you came to our department, you had a reputation, and not a good one. HR told us that and S.S. seconded it. Somehow though, you were forced down our throats. (Thanks again, HR!) You have since lived up to your reputation and have managed to make it even larger and worse. I don't deserve any credit for that, YOU did that all on your own; the same way YOU are keeping yourself from moving forward to a new job within the company. You are qualified for many of the jobs you have applied for......but it's your bad reputation that keeps you from getting them. No one wants to bring you into their department. They've witnessed you in the lunch room, heard about your horrible treatment of your co-workers, your lack of respect for authority, and frequent, rotten attitude with customers. I could go on and on, but I think you know what I'm talking about. I hate to say it, but I'm going to. You are the living embodiment of a bitch and in this case, that's not a compliment. I hope you enjoying answering those phones, because that's what you're going to be doing for a LONG time. (At least until they get enough write-ups to let you go.)
P.S. The next time you cross in front of my car, at Kohl's or anywhere else, rest assured that no matter how much I loathe you, I will not run you over. Ever. No matter how much I want to.....and I DID want to!
A.K. - S.S. wasn't kidding when she told you that you are a mean girl. Really, she told me she wasn't kidding! She was right! If you think He only sees what you do when you are in church or on a mission trip, you're wrong. He sees how you treat people at work and while I can't speak for Him, I can only imagine that what He sees you do at work does not make Him too happy. If you're going to be a "good Lutheran girl", then you should do so all the time; not just when you think He is watching. (He's not an elf, helping Santa decide if you get that new doll or not.) Intentionally lying, to get others in trouble (Among other things.) does not a "good Lutheran girl" make. I faked liking you, as much, if not more, than you faked liking me!
S. B. - Where to start?! I think that you and Brooke were probably born of the same mother, but in a different double-wide community. You both share the same skill for butchering the English language and using pathetically improper grammar. Although I've never seen you staple the hem of your pants, there have been plenty of other disasters of equal proportion. The shirt with the slit openings going down the sleeves, that exposed the upper half of your arms. In the office? Really? I don't think so. Going out on a weekend, maybe. This from the woman that banned sleeveless tops in the department? (Not the company, just our department!) I know I'm not telling you anything earth shattering here, but with that one ridiculous move alone, you made Customer Service the laughing stock of the entire building and the butt of MANY jokes. Yes, you will never see a Customer Service rep in a meeting, with people from other departments, wearing a sleeveless shirt. Everyone else in the meeting is probably wearing them; but not the puritans of Customer Service. Speaking of wardrobes, we all found it so refreshing that you would take N.W. shopping with you for new clothes. (Her taste is decidedly better than yours.....seriously.) That's just the kind of thing that HR recommends all mangers do with their employees. (All of the great supervision gurus recommend this, I'm sure.) It goes a long way towards building those great relationships; as does being their friend on Facebook, right? I know you encouraged me to hang with my team outside of the office and buddy up with them, but I just didn't feel that was appropriate.
You have shown me (And others.) how NOT to manage.
I have learned that if I want to be a good leader (Like you.) I should develop personal relationships with my employees outside of the office and agree with them when they say their supervisor is mean or picking on them. (Even though the supervisor is doing what what I have told them to do, or what they should be doing.) I should develop and implement policies based on my own outdated and ridiculous preferences. If I want to be a good leader (Like you.), I should strive to make my employees feel that they can trust me, and then stab them in the back repeatedly. In order to be such a leader, I should let the employees do whatever they want; after all, no good leader puts the kibosh on employees running amok. (Even when they are up to no good and not doing their job.) So that I can be a good leader, I will target an employee, lie to HR multiple times, discuss an employee's performance with her peers and her employees and feel good about it. Oh yes, the lessons from you are many!
My parting words to you are this - You are great....in your own mind. There isn't a person in the department that still trusts you or respects you. (Except maybe the new ones that may not have seen you in action yet.) You have blatantly and intentionally disrespected and lied to nearly everyone in Customer Service....and countless others outside of the department, I'm sure. As evidenced by the letter you received from some of your employees, they've got your number. (Although, I still say that they crossed a line by bringing your son into that letter.) I think it's great that you will soon have a Director to report to. Hopefully that person didn't attend the same school of management that you did.
D. W. - You are only fooling yourself. Really! No one else believes for a second that you know what you are doing. Behind your back, everyone talks about how little you know. Questions that someone in your position should easily be able to answer, you cannot answer. Answers that you often give are wrong. (I've done this before too, but I don't believe nearly as often as you have.) You fail to have a grasp on the simplest of concepts and how things should be done. You are a joke among your own employees, most of whom know more than you do.
So, I think I'm done. There are others that I probably could address, but they are "extras" and not really relevant to the story line. Today, my third "occasion" comes to a close. The lid is on the proverbial toile tin. "You can "check out anytime you like, but you can never leave." WRONG....at least in this case. I have happily checked out of Sneera Badly and and I am leaving it where it belongs.......to the Stepford Wives that inhabit it. The Stepford Wives that behave badly.
Let the celebration begin! I AM FREE!!!!!!
Now, I think I'll go eat a bowl of popcorn (Without the flowered, cotton napkin.), run around town with no make-up on (Wearing sweat pants!) and smiling......alot.
Oh yeah, and carrying a leather handbag! ; )
